How to Get a Child to Stop Hitting: 7 Tips for Parents and Teachers

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When a child hits you or somebody else, you can really feel frustrated or embarrassed. It could additionally be hard to maintain your personal feelings in check. For some parents or teachers, it can really feel like they’ve somehow failed.

It’s important to perceive that at some point, every child will hit. Knowing what causes this behavior and the way to cease it from happening will help.

What Causes Children to Hit?

Children may hit one other person for a number of different reasons:

  1. Feelings – One of the biggest causes a child may hit one other person is because they’re unable to handle their very personal feelings. They discover it difficult to express these feelings in a socially acceptable way. Understanding feelings and the way they’re feeling is a big a half of a child’s development. This is a skill that a child will start to learn over time.
  2. Impulse control – Without impulse control, it makes it almost impossible for a kid to administration how they react when one thing makes them really feel upset or frustrated. As an adult, you perceive how difficult it could additionally be to administration your personal impulses when you’re confronted with a less-than-desirable situation. Now think about how difficult it could additionally be for a kid to discover out impulse administration at such a youthful age. Again, it’s a skill that they will learn over time.
  3. Language – When a child doesn’t have the phrases to express how they’re feeling, they will express their feelings in one other way – on this case, by hitting. If a child is fairly youthful or their vocabulary isn’t as developed, not having the phrases they want creates its personal problem and they will likely resort to what feels best on the time.
  4. Consequences – As a child will get older and they’re confronted with different situations, they will start to learn that their actions have consequences. Without this understanding, a youthful child particularly will hit one other person not fully comprehending how that makes the opposite person feel.
  5. Manipulation – Think about how difficult it could additionally be to be a child that doesn’t always have choices. The urge to get their very personal way can simply overpower them, and they will use hitting to manipulate one other person so as to get it. They will use aggression to get one other person to change their thoughts or allow them to do something.

How to Get a Child to Stop Hitting: 7 Tips

So the place do you start when it involves getting your child to cease hitting? It comes down to a mixture of teaching and discipline. These 7 tips can help.

1. Teaching skills that matter

Without having skills to handle their anger, merely telling a child to “quit hitting” will have no impact. Anger administration skills are learned. A parent or teacher is a nice role model.

It begins with understanding their feelings – not solely anger, however sadness and frustration as well. When they hit somebody else, sit down and talk with them about how they were feeling when it happened. Once they’re able to obviously perceive their emotions, you’re able to assist them discover methods to deal with their anger and different feelings as well.

Help them discover methods to deal with their anger. Taking deep breaths, listening to music, drawing a picture, studying a book, or discovering a spot to sit alone are all nice instruments to handle their feelings.

2. Establishing clear rules

Before you create a list of rules, assist them to perceive the idea of respect. Let them know that they want to not solely respect others, however that they deserve respect as well.

First and foremost, make sure they perceive that no type of bodily aggression ought to be tolerated. That includes biting, kicking, pushing, and hitting. It’s easy for guidelines to really feel like their very personal punishment, so try and keep issues positive as a lot as possible. For example, rather than claiming “no pushing”, say “keep your hands to yourself”. From these guidelines will come consequences.

3. Create consequences – Once a child is aware of the rules, it’s time to clarify and implement the penalties of breaking them. Having penalties is a nice deterrent that will keep them from hitting again. These three basic penalties are a nice place to start:

  • Losing privileges – Taking away a privilege can be very effective. The age of the kid will assist you decide the suitable privilege to take away. This may imply that they’re unable to play with a favourite toy, screen time is reduced or eradicated altogether, or they aren’t able to take part in a favourite activity. Make sure that you retain the time to lower than 24 hours, relying on the age of the kid and the way serious the situation was.
  • Having a time out – Time outs come again to regulating a child’s emotions. It is a easy way to separate them from the situation they’re reacting to and permit them time to chill off. When their time out is over, be certain to speak with them about how they reacted and permit them to know that hitting is not an appropriate response.
  • Making amends – Once they’re calm, encourage them to make amends. For youthful children and older children as well, a verbal apology can be difficult. Help them to make use of their phrases to say they’re sorry. Actions can additionally heal a situation – a handmade image or one other act of kindness works well too.

4. Avoid sure punishments

Physical punishment sends the incorrect message at any time, however particularly when the motion you are punishing is physical. It can in fact increase their aggression. Modeling and teaching self-control will assist a child deal with these negative feelings with out being physical.

5. Focus on the positive

Try to make studying a positive expertise whenever possible. When a child makes a good choice different than hitting, reward them with praise. You can additionally assist them keep track of their good choices with a reward system such as a sticker chart.

6. Think about yourself

Ask yourself, “Am I dealing with myself within the way I want them to deal with themself when confronted with a difficult situation?” A calm voice and gentle phrases can go a lengthy way. Understandably, it could additionally be hard to react the way we wish to every time. However, our negative feelings and behavior can be a set off for children.

7. Ask for help

A child’s pediatrician can assist when you end up unable to deal with the situation in your own. They will ask questions and consider them to discover out the subsequent best steps.

Remember, the way you reply to a child issues greater than something else. It can be difficult to discover the patience you need. Just know that you’re their best teacher. Over time, they will gain the psychological and emotional instruments they want to handle their feelings and their behavior.

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